How Your Partner can Help in Labor
Although much of labor is a mental game, birth partners can play a pivotal role in our ability to cope. The right one will keep us grounded, focused, and calm when things get intense.
That said, if this is their first time supporting someone in labor, they may need a nudge in the right direction.
Whether the partner in your birth space is a spouse, a dear friend, or a doula, here are some ways they can support you.
Double Hip Squeezes & Counter Pressure
These two coping techniques can change the game of a challenging labor. Double hip squeezes open the pelvis slightly and gently stretch the surrounding tissues, relieving pain and pressure during a wave.
Counter pressure alleviates back pain, especially when baby is malpositioned.
Watch this tutorial on how to do a double hip squeeze!
Help You Stay Hydrated & Nourished
At a certain point, your focus will shift entirely to coping with the waves of labor. And they don’t call it “labor” for nothing - getting a baby out is hard work! As such, it’s imperative to stay well hydrated and nourished so your body works more efficiently. Your partner can encourage this by giving you sips of water and small bites of easy-to-digest snacks.
Get the Oxytocin Flowing
The same thing that put the baby in, is what gets the baby out! Oxytocin, also called the “love drug” works to thin and open the cervix. Your partner can help get oxytocin flowing by slow dancing with you, providing nipple stimulation, or by simply hugging you.
Encourage Position Changes
When we’re in labor, we often go to a place called “labor land.” Time loses meaning and our focus goes inward. During this time, our partners can remind us to change positions. Changing positions every 30 - 45 minutes encourages labor progress and can help with comfort.
Massage or Gentle Touch
Massage or gentle touch such as hand holding can be a great way to provide comfort during or in between labor waves. Many mamas love this distraction and find it to be a helpful coping technique. It’s also another great way to stimulate oxytocin!
Give Affirmations
Affirmations have been proven to rewire our brains. They help us cope and adapt to new challenges - like labor! When your partner says the affirmations, they may not only give you the extra push you need (no pun intended), but they’ll be beneficial for your partner’s mindset, too.
Be Your Advocate
When we’re in labor, the thinking parts of our brains go quiet and allow the more primitive parts to take over. We go inward as our bodies work hard to push out our babies. This makes it incredibly difficult to answer questions or think rationally. Your partner, who is familiar with your birth plan and preferences, can be your advocate and remind your medical team of your wishes.
Handle Communication
I promise you this, you will not be concerned with texting your mom, or aunt Susie, or cousin June about the progress you’re making in labor. But if you do want them to be in the loop, this is a great job for your partner. While you’re focused on working through the waves, your partner can handle the text updates.
Like this post? Don’t forget to send your partner the link! And best wishes with your labor, mama. You’ve got this.
